This mail sounds interesting. Go through it when you have time. Subject: INFY Chairman and his woman - true life story WORTH READING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am sure you will like and appreciate >this true life story of Mrs and Mr Narayan Murthy. have fun reading this........... Sudha Murthy, wife of Infosys Chairman Narayanamurthy, talking about > > her life and the story of how Infosys was born. > > > > It was in Pune that I met Narayan Murty through my friend Prasanna who > > > > is now the Wipro chief, who was also training in Telco.Most of the > > > books > > > > that Prasanna lent me had Murty's name on them which meant that I had > > a > > > > preconceived image of the man.Contrary to expectation,Murty was shy, > > > > bespectacled and an introvert. When he invited us for dinner,I was > > a > > > > bit taken aback as I thought the young man was making a very fast > > > move.I > > > > refused since I was the only girl in the group.But Murty was > > > relentless > > > > and we all decided to meet for dinner the next day at 7.30 p.m at > > > Green > > > > Fields hotel on the Main Road, Pune. The next day I went there at 7 > > o > > > > clock since I had to go to the tailor near the hotel.And what do I > > see? > > > Mr > > > > Murty waiting in front of the hotel and it was only seven.Till > > today, > > > > Murty maintains that I had mentioned (consciously!)that I would be > > > going > > > > to the tailor at 7 so that I could meet him...And I maintain that I > > did > > > > not say any such thing consciously or unconsciously because I did > > not > > > > think of Murty as anything other than a friend at that stage. > > > > > > > > We have agreed to disagree on this matter. Soon, we became friends. > > Our > > > > conversations were filled with Murty's experiences abroad and the > > > books > > > > that he has read. My friends insisted that Murty was trying to > > impress > > > > me because he was interested in me.I kept denying it till one fine > > > day, > > > > after dinner Murty said, I want to tell you something. I knew this > > was > > > > it. It was coming. He said, I am 5'4" tall. I come from a lower > > middle > > > > class family. I can never become rich in my life and I can never > > give > > > > you any riches. You are beautiful, bright, intelligent and you can > > get > > > > anyone you want.But will you marry me? I asked Murty to give me some > > > > time for an answer.My father didn't want me to marry a wannabe > > > > politician,(a communist at that) who didn't have a steady job and > > > wanted > > > > to build an orphanage... When I went to Hubli I told my parents > > about > > > > Murty and his proposal. My mother was positive since Murty was also > > > from > > > > Karnataka,seemed intelligent and comes from a good family. But my > > > father > > > > asked:What's his job, his salary, his qualifications etc? > > > > > > > > Murty was working as a research assistant and was earning less than > > > me.He > > > > was willing to go dutch with me on our outings. My parents agreed to > > > meet > > > > Murty in Pune on a particular day at 10 a. m sharp. Murty did not > > turn > > > > up. How can I trust a man to take care of my daughter if he cannot > > > keep > > > > an appointment,asked my father.At 12 noon Murty turned up in a > > bright > > > red > > > > shirt! He had gone on work to Bombay, was stuck in a > > > > traffic jam on the ghats, so he hired a taxi(though it was very > > > > expensive for him) to meet his would-be father-in-law. Father was > > > > unimpressed. My father asked him what he wanted to become in life. > > > Murty > > > > said he wanted to become a politician in the communist party and > > wanted > > > > to open an orphanage. My father gave his verdict. NO. I don't want > > my > > > > daughter to marry somebody who wants to become a communist and then > > > open > > > > an orphanage when he himself didn't have money to support his family. > > > > Ironically, today, I have opened many orphanages something which > > > Murty > > > > wanted to do 25 years ago. > > > > > > > > By this time I realized I had developed a liking towards Murty which > > > > could only be termed as love. I wanted to marry Murty because he is > > > an > > > > honest man. He proposed to me highlighting the negatives in his > > life. > > > I > > > > promised my father that I will not marry Murty without his blessings > > > > though at the same time, I cannot marry anybody else. My father said > > > he > > > > would agree if Murty promised to take up a steady job. But Murty > > > refused > > > > saying he will not do things in life because somebody wanted him to. > > > So, > > > > I was caught between the two most important people in my life. The > > > > stalemate continued for three years during which our courtship took > > us > > > > to every restaurant and cinema hall in Pune. In those days, Murty > > was > > > > always broke. Moreover, he didn't earn much to manage. Ironically > > > today, > > > > he manages Infosys Technologies Ltd,one of the world's most reputed > > > > companies. He always owed me money. We used to go for dinner and he > > > > would say, I don't have money with me, you pay my share, I will return > > > it > > > > to you later. For three years I maintained a book on Murty's debt to > > > > me. No, he never returned the money and I finally tore it up after my > > > > wedding. The amount was a little over Rs 4000. > > > > > > > > During this interim period Murty quit his job as research assistant > > and > > > > started his own software business. Now, I had to pay his salary > > too! > > > > Towards the late 70s computers were entering India in a big way. > > During > > > > the fag end of 1977 Murty decided to take up a job as General Manager > > > at > > > > Patni Computers in Bombay. But before he joined the company he wanted > > > to > > > > marry me since he was to go on training to the US after joining. My > > > > father gave in as he was happy Murty had a decent job, now. WE WERE > > > > MARRIED IN MURTY'S HOUSE IN BANGALORE ON FEBRUARY 10, 1978 WITH ONLY > > > OUR > > > > TWO FAMILIES PRESENT. I GOT MY FIRST SILK SARI.THE WEDDING EXPENSES > > > CAME > > > > TO ONLY RS 800 (US $ 17) WITH MURTY AND I POOLING IN RS 400 EACH. > > > > > > > > I went to the US with Murty after marriage. Murty encouraged me to > > see > > > > America on my own because I loved travelling. I toured America for > > > three > > > > months on backpack and had interesting experiences which will remain > > > > fresh in my mind forever. Like the time when I was taken into > > custody > > > by > > > > the New York police because they thought I was an Italian trafficking > > > > drugs in Harlem or the time when I spent the night at the bottom of > > > the > > > > Grand Canyon with an old couple. Murty panicked because he couldn't > > get > > > a > > > > response from my hotel room even at midnight. He thought I was either > > > > killed or kidnapped. IN 1981 MURTY WANTED TO START INFOSYS. HE HAD A > > > > VISION AND ZERO CAPITAL... initially I was very apprehensive about > > > > Murty getting into business. We did not have any business > > background. > > > > Moreover we were living a comfortable life in Bombay with a regular > > > pay > > > > check and I didn't want to rock the boat. But Murty was passionate > > > > about creating good quality software. > > > > > > > > I decided to support him. Typical of Murty, he just had a dream and > > > no > > > > money. So I gave him Rs 10,000 which I had saved for a rainy day, > > > > without his knowledge and told him, This is all I have. Take it. I > > > give > > > > you three years sabbatical leave. I will take care of the financial > > > > needs of our house. You go and chase your dreams without any worry. > > > But > > > > you have only three years! Murty and his six colleagues started > > Infosys > > > > in 1981,with enormous interest and hard work. In 1982 I left Telco > > and > > > > moved to Pune with Murty.We bought a small house on loan which also > > > > became the Infosys office. I was a clerk-cum-cook-cum-programmer. I > > > also > > > > took up a job as Senior Systems Analyst with Walchand group of > > > > Industries to support the house. > > > > > > > > > > > > In 1983 Infosys got their first client, MICO, in Bangalore. Murty > > > moved > > > > to Bangalore and stayed with his mother while I went to Hubli to > > > deliver > > > > my second child, Rohan. Ten days after my son was born, Murty left > > for > > > > the US on project work. I saw him only after a year as I was unable > > to > > > > join Murty in the US because my son had infantile eczema, an allergy > > to > > > > vaccinations. So for more than a year I did not step outside our home > > > > for fear of my son contracting an infection. It was only after Rohan > > > got > > > > all his vaccinations that I came to Bangalore where we rented a small > > > > house in Jayanagar and rented another house as Infosys headquarters. > > > My > > > > father presented Murty a scooter to commute. I once again became a > > > cook, > > > > programmer, clerk, secretary, office assistant etal.Nandan > > Nilekani(MD > > > > of Infosys) and his wife Rohini stayed with us. While Rohini babysat > > > my > > > > son, I wrote programmes for Infosys. There was no car, no phone,just > > > two > > > > kids and a bunch of us working hard, juggling our lives and having > > fun > > > > while Infosys was taking shape. It was not only me but the wives of > > > > other partners too who gave their unstinted support. We all knew > > that > > > > our men were trying to build something good. It was like a big joint > > > > family,taking care and looking out for one another. I still remember > > > > Sudha Gopalakrishna looking after my daughter Akshata with all care > > > and > > > > love while Kumari Shibulal cooked for all of us. Murty made it very > > > > clear that it would either be me or him working at Infosys. Never > > the > > > > two of us together... I was involved with Infosys initially. Nandan > > > > Nilekani suggested I should be on the Board but Murty said he did > > not > > > > want a husband and wife team at Infosys. I was shocked since I had > > the > > > > relevant experience and technical qualifications. He said, Sudha if > > > you > > > > want to work with Infosys, I will withdraw, happily. > > > > > > > > I was pained to know that I will not be involved in the company my > > > > husband was building and that I would have to give up a job that I > > am > > > > qualified to do and love doing. It took me a couple of days to grasp > > the > > > > reason behind Murty's request. I realised that to make Infosys a > > > success > > > > one had to give one's 100 percent.One had to be focussed on it alone > > > with > > > > no other distractions. If the two of us had to give 100 percent to > > > Infosys > > > > then what would happen to our home and our children? One of us had to > > > take > > > > care of our home while the other took care of Infosys. I opted to be > > a > > > > homemaker, after all Infosys was Murty's dream.It was a big > > sacrifice > > > but > > > > it was one that had to be made. Even today, Murty says,Sudha, I > > > stepped > > > > on your career to make mine. You are responsible for my success. I > > > might > > > > have given up my career for my husband's sake. But that does not > > make > > > me > > > > a doormat... Many think that I have been made the sacrificial lamb at > > > > Narayan Murty's altar of success. A few women journalists have even > > > > accused me of setting a wrong example by giving up my dreams to make > > my > > > > husbands a reality. Is'nt freedom about living your life the way you > > > want > > > > it? What is right for one person might be wrong for another. It is up > > > to > > > > the individual to make a choice that is effective in her life.I feel > > > that > > > > when a woman gives up her right to choose for herself is when she > > > crosses > > > > over from being an individual to a doormat. > > > > > > > > Murty's dreams encompassed not only himself but a generation of > > > > people.It was about founding something worthy, exemplary and > > > honorable. > > > > It was about creation and distribution of wealth. His dreams were > > > > grander than my career plans, in all aspects. So, when I had to > > choose > > > > between Murty's career and mine, I opted for what I thought was a > > right > > > > choice. We had a home and two little children. Measles, mumps, > > > > fractures, PTA meetings, wants and needs of growing children do not > > > care > > > > much for grandiose dreams. They just needed to be attended to. > > Somebody > > > > had to take care of it all.Somebody had to stay back to create a home > > > > base that would be fertile for healthy growth, happiness, and more > > > dreams > > > > to dream.I became that somebody willingly.I can confidently say > > > > that if I had had a dream like Infosys, Murty would have given me > > his > > > > unstinted support.The roles would have been reversed. > > > > > > > > We are not bound by the archaic rules of marriage.I cook for him but > > I > > > > don't wait up to serve dinner like a traditional wife.So, he has no > > > > hassles about heating up the food and having his dinner.He does not > > > > intrude into my time especially when I am writing my novels.He does > > > not > > > > interfere in my work at the Infosys Foundation and I don't interfere > > > > with the running of Infosys. I teach Computer Science to MBA and > > MCA > > > > students at Christ college for a few hours every week and I earn > > > around > > > > Rs 50,000 a year.I value this financial independence greatly though > > > > there is no need for me to pursue a teaching career. Murty respects > > > > that.I travel all over the world without Murty because he hates] > > > > travelling.We trust each other implicitly. We have another > > > understanding > > > > too. While he earns the money, I spend it, mostly through the > > > > charity.Philanthropy is a profession and an art... > > > > > > > > The Infosys Foundation was born in 1997 with the sole objective of > > > > uplifting the less-privileged sections of society. IN THE PAST > > THREE > > > > YEARS WE HAVE BUILT HOSPITALS, ORPHANAGES, REHABILITATION CENTRES, > > > > SCHOOL BUILDINGS, SCIENCE CENTRES AND MORE THAN 3500 LIBRARIES. Our > > > work > > > > is mainly in the rural areas amongst women and children.I am one of > > the > > > > trustees and our activities span six states including Karnataka, > > Tamil > > > > Nadu, Andhra, Orissa, Chandigarh and Maharashtra.I travel to around > > > 800 > > > > villages constantly. Infosys Foundation has a minimal staff of three > > > > trustees and three office members. We all work very hard to achieve > > > our > > > > goals and that is the reason why Infosys Foundation has a distinct > > > > identity. > > > > > > > > Every year we donate around Rs 5-6 crore (Rs 50 - 60 million). We > > run > > > > Infosys Foundation the way Murty runs Infosys in a professional and > > > > scientific way. Philanthropy is a profession and an art. It can be > > > used > > > > or misused. We slowly want to increase the donations and we dream of > > a > > > > time when Infosys Foundation could donate large amounts of money. > > > Every > > > > year we receive more than 10,000 applications for donations. > > Everyday > > > I > > > > receive more than 1 calls. Amongst these,there are those who > > genuinely > > > > need help and there are hood winkers too. I receive letters asking > > me > > > to > > > > donate Rs five lakh to someone because five lakh is, like peanuts to > > > > Infosys.Some people write to us asking for free Infosys shares.Over > > > the > > > > years I have learnt to differentiate the wheat from the chaff, > > though > > > I > > > > still give a patient hearing to all the cases. > > > > > > > > Sometimes I feel I have lost the ability to trust people. I have > > > become > > > > shrewder to avoid being conned. It saddens me to realise that even as > > a > > > > person is talking to me I try to analyse them: Has he come here for > > any > > > > donation? Why is he praising my work or enquiring about my health, > > does > > > > he want some money from me? Eight out of ten times I am right. They > > do > > > > want my money. But I feel bad for the other two whom I suspected. I > > > > think that is the price that I have to pay for the position that I > > am > > > in > > > > now. The greatest difficulty in having money is teaching your > > children > > > > the value of it and trying to keep them on a straight line.... > > > Bringing > > > > up children in a moneyed atmosphere is a difficult task. EVEN TODAY I > > > > THINK TWICE IF I HAVE TO SPEND RS 10 ON AN AUTO WHEN I CAN WALK UP > > TO > > > > MY HOUSE. I cannot expect my children to do the same. > > > > > > > > They have seen money from the time they were born. But we can lead > > by > > > > example. When they see Murty wash his own plate after eating and > > clean > > > > the two toilets in the house everyday they realise that no work is > > > > demeaning irrespective of how rich you are. I DON'T HAVE A MAID AT > > > HOME > > > > BECAUSE I DON'T SEE THE NEED FOR ONE.When children see both parents > > > > working hard, living a simple life, most of the time they tend to > > > > follow. This doesn't mean we expect our children to live an austere > > > > life. My children buy what they want and go where they want but they > > > > have to follow certain rules.They will have to show me a bill for > > > > whatever they buy.My daughter can buy five new outfits but she has > > to > > > > give away five old ones. My son can go out with his friends for > > lunch > > > or > > > > dinner but if he wants to go to a five star hotel, we discourage it. > > Or > > > > we accompany him.So far my children haven't given me any heartbreak. > > > > They are good children. Myeldest daughter is studying abroad, > > whereas > > > > my son is studying in Bangalore. They don't use their father's name > > in > > > > vain. If asked, they only say that his name is Murty and that he > > works > > > > for Infosys.They don't want to be recognised and appreciated because > > > of > > > > their father or me but for themselves. > > > > > > > > I DON'T FEEL GUILTY ABOUT HAVING MONEY FOR WE HAVE WORKED HARD FOR > > IT. > > > > BUT I DON'T FEEL COMFORTABLE FLAUNTING IT ...IT IS A CONSCIOUS > > > DECISION > > > > ON OUR PART TO LIVE A SIMPLE, SO- CALLED MIDDLE CLASS LIFE. WE LIVE > > IN > > > > THE SAME TWO- BEDROOM, SPARSELY FURNISHED HOUSE BEFORE INFOSYS > > BECAME > > > A > > > > SUCCESS. Our only extravagance is buying books and CDs.MY HOUSE HAS > > NO > > > > LOCKERS > > > > FOR I HAVE NO JEWELS. I WEAR A STONE EARRING WHICH I BOUGHT IN > > BOMBAY > > > > FOR RS 100 . I don't even wear my mangalsutra until I attend some > > > family > > > > functions or I am with my mother-in-law. I am not fond of jewellery > > or > > > > saris. Five years ago, I went to Kashi where tradition demands that > > you > > > > give up something and I gave up shopping.Since then I haven't bought > > > > myself a sari or gone shopping. It is my friends who gift me with > > > saris. > > > > Murty bought me a sari a long time ago. It was not to my taste and I > > > > told him to refrain from buying saris for me in the future.I am no > > > good > > > > at selecting men's clothes either. It is my daughter who does the > > > > shopping for us. I still have the same sofa at home which my > > daughter > > > > wants to change. However, we have indulged ourselves with each one > > > > having their own music system and computer. I don't carry a purse > > and > > > > neither does Murty most of the time. I do tell him to keep some > > small > > > > change with him but he doesn't. I borrow money from y secretary or > > my > > > > driver if I need cash. They know my habit so they always carry extra > > > > cash with them. But I settle the accounts every evening. MURTY AND I > > > ARE > > > > VERY COMFORTABLE WITH OUR LIFESTYLE AND WE DON'T SEE THE NEED TO > > CHANGE > > > > IT NOW THAT WE HAVE MONEY. Murty and I are two opposites that > > > > complement each other... > > > > > > > > Murty is sensitive and romantic in his own way.He always gifts me > > > books > > > > addressed to From Me to You. Or to the person I most admire etc. We > > > both > > > > love books. We are both complete opposites. I am an extrovert and he > > > is > > > > an introvert. I love watching movies and listening to classical > > music. > > > > Murty loves listening to English classical music.I go out for > > movies > > > > with my students and secretary every other week. I am still young > > at > > > > heart. I really enjoyed watching "Kaho Na Pyaar Hai" and I am a > > > Hrithik > > > > Roshan fan. It has been more than years since Murty and I went for > > a > > > > movie. My daughter once gave us a surprise by booking tickets for > > > > "Titanic". Since I had a prior engagement that day, Murty went for > > the > > > > movie with his secretary Pandu. I love travelling whereas Murty > > loves > > > > spending time at home. Friends come and go with the share prices... > > > Even > > > > in my dreams, I did not expect Infosys to grow like the way it has. I > > > > don't think even Murty envisioned this phenomenal success, at least > > > not > > > > in 1981. After Infosys went public in 1993, we became what people > > > would > > > > call as rich, moneyed people. I was shocked to see what was > > happening > > > to > > > > Infosys and to us. Suddenly you see and hear about so much money. > > > Your > > > > name and photo is splashed in the papers. People talk about you. > > > > It was all new to me. > > > > > > > > SUDDENLY I HAVE PEOPLE WALKING UP TO ME SAYING, OH, WE WERE SUCH > > GOOD > > > > FRIENDS, WE HAD A MEAL 25 YEARS AGO.THEY CLAIM TO HAVE BEEN PRESENT > > AT > > > > OUR WEDDING (WHICH IS AN UTTER LIE BECAUSE ONLY MY FAMILY WAS > > PRESENT > > > AT > > > > MY WEDDING). I DON'T EVEN KNOW ALL THESE PEOPLE WHO CLAIM TO KNOW > > MURTY > > > > AND ME SO WELL. But that doesn't mean I don't have true friends. I do > > > > have genuine friends, a handful, who have been with me for a very > > long > > > > time. My equation with these people has not changed and vice versa. > > I > > > am > > > > also very close to Narayan Murty's family, especially my sister-in-law > > > > Kamala Murty, a school teacher, who is more of a dear friend to me. > > I > > > > have discovered that these are the few relationships and friendships > > > > that don't fluctuate depending on the price of Infosys shares. Have > > I > > > > lost my identity as a woman, in Murty's shadow?... No. I might be Mrs > > > > Narayan Murty. I might be Akshata and Rohan's mother. I might be the > > > > trustee of Infosys Foundation. But I am still Sudha.. I play different > > > > roles like all women. That doesn't mean we don't have our own > > > > identity. > > > > > > > > Women have that extra quality of adaptability and learn to fit into > > > > different shoes. But we are our own selves still. And we have to > > exact > > > > our freedom by making the right choices in our lives, dictated by us > > > and > > > > not by the world. > > > > > > > > SUDHA MURTHY > > > > ........................... |
